Thursday, February 24, 2011

Wasting my life away...

I am not what you call a healthy person. I have a weak immune system, asthma, a low thyroid, Meniere's Disease, poor circulation, blood sugar problems, a bit of insomnia, and several other issues that I won't mention at this moment. I have so many health issues that it's hard to keep track of them. I have to carry a list of the medicines I take so that I can properly fill out forms at doctors visits. Because of my severe asthma, which has put me in the hospital twice and on bed rest for a total of at least 8 months during the past 5 years, a simple cold puts me into panic mode. Because of my weak immune system, I catch every bug that comes my way. And when I catch something as simple as a cold or as bad as bronchitis, I keep it until my lungs forget how to work properly. They forget how to stop coughing.
So I rest until it is gone, which is easier to do now that I'm living at home with my mother and stepfather and currently unemployed, and I take more medicine than you can imagine. I am currently taking three nasal sprays, anti-anxiety medication (because it relaxes my muscles, most importantly my lungs), Singulair, Advair, Dulera, Allegra, codeine cough syrup, steroids, and having to use a nebulizer for breathing treatments. And don't forget the sinus medicine and sinus rinses, which feels more like water-boarding than a helpful health aid. I'm drinking boocoodles of water to help flush the bad things out of my body, and enough tea with lemon and honey to keep me awake even with all the meds. Honey is supposedly an antibiotic. Oh! I'm also taking an antibiotic pill. The problem is that what should be a common cold has settled in my chest and moved in. It's as though my lungs are addicted to coughing and can't give it up. Every time I get them back on the easy-breathing-wagon, they fall right back off. I seem destined to spend more time in my bed than out.
People say I should be grateful that I don't have something as awful as cancer, and believe you me, I am. But that doesn't mean I'm any less upset about my condition. Asthma is something that people live with everyday. And most days I don't even remember I have asthma. But for several months every year, it runs my life. Hopefully this battle with asthma that I am currently facing will only last a few more days. Please, Lord, no more than a week!
So I am back to wasting my life away in my bed. Quite frequently the time I spend lolling in my bed is my own choice, but right now, I don't have one. The fear of this cold turning into a three month battle is too much for me to handle right now. So I ask God what lesson there is for me to learn from this and repeat to myself that this will only make me stronger, if it doesn't kill me first. But truly, what lesson do I have to learn? Other than to stay away from people who are sick?

1 comment:

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